Recently I got my GCSE exam timetable for this year. I’m in year 10 so I still have another year of exams after this one. This year I have 10 exams and I really just want to get them over and done with.
I’m really struggling right now if I’m honest. My head is, for lack of a better word, in the shits. This week has been really hard in my head because of these exams.
I’m in top set meaning I should be getting As and A*s in my exams but right now I’m struggling to get Bs. I feel really put down by it all and I feel like I’m just really shit at everything.
I recently got 46% in a physics exam. I mean to be fair everyone did pretty crap as well but still. I’m also really not understanding maths at the moment and maths is one of my good subjects and it’s what I want to do for A level.
I don’t understand what’s happening to me. If I don’t get the good grades then I can’t to my dream college and if I don’t get there I will cry for days.
I really feel like I’m not good enough to go there. It’s a pretty high standard school. A girl for year 11 just got in there. She’s so lucky and I envy her. I really feel like I will never get there. I cry a lot when I’m alone because I feel like this.
I was doing well in years 7 to 9 but now… ugh! It’s so hard. I thought I’d be okay at it. Some times its okay but right now I feel like I was running along happily but then I slammed into a brick wall.
Life is hard. I want to try to be positive but you can’t always be like that. So right now I’m kind of depressed but I really can’t help it. It’s balances.
Sorry if I bored you with any of this. I just really wanted to write my feelings down and get them out.
– Willow xx